Brazenmom

Keeping Motherhood Real

Dear Diary: marshmallow guy alert!

Posted by Andrea On November - 27 - 2009

queen-alien-geigerThe big 37 week mark has come and gone: my baby girl is fully grown and if she is born any time from yesterday she will be considered a full-term baby, not prem. Awesome. Her head is getting ready to ‘engage’ and I have put together a vague semblance of a birth plan (involving no epidural – I do consider myself quite insane) that I still need to write down in my antenatal book. Note to self: write down birth plan. Other than that I am still shitting – no changes there. I have had very few ‘baby dreams’ of late, other than one significant dream that certainly makes up for the lack. I had a dream that I was in labour for what seemed like ever and when I eventually gave birth, my baby looked like a miniature H.R. Geiger Alien but cream-coloured rather than black. I remember being a little scared of the baby but I still loved it, which, hopefully, is an indication that if I breed a mutant I will still love it. So that’s good news.

With each passing day, I am beginning to morph into the likeness of the giant marshmallow guy in Ghostbusters and to say that I can’t wait to get rid of the water retention that is plaguing my body is the understatement of the year. I have a work function onstay-puft-marshmallow-man-ghostbusters Tuesday and the dress code is ‘smart’ – WTF am I supposed to wear? I have a choice of approximately three items – none of which are smart! And I won’t even get started on shoes. **sigh** The trials and tribulations of a pregnant woman. Life is tough. Yes, that is facetious dear diary. I am actually feeling great, albeit afraid, and have very little to bitch about. In fact, I do not like being treated like a ‘pregnant woman’ ie. piece of china. Throughout my pregnancy I have continued to do the things that I did pre-baby, and have no intention of stopping three weeks before my due date. A tad proud? Yes indeed! I just pray that a) I don’t go into labour in Chichester this weekend (it would suck), and b) I don’t go into labour on or before December 3 – I have asked baby Amelia very nicely to only make an appearance after In Flames and Killswitch Engage have played their sets on Thursday evening.

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Keeping Motherhood Real

BrazenMom is a site dedicated to moms with attitude: moms who love their babies but wish to remain independent and assertive without succumbing to the momness of pastel colours, poofy carry bags, perfume ala baby powder and tracksuit pants. The site aims to keep motherhood real by providing information relevant to moms in an opinionated, satirical, entertaining and completely biased manner. Expect to laugh, cry, anger, and most importantly, VENT, without judgment. The site includes feature stories; product and clothing news, views and information; book reviews; and personal accounts relating to being a mom. It is a forum for discussion, comment and argument, and is a way to learn from the experiences of other moms who wish to share. Comments are encouraged, swearing is appreciated and guest authors are most welcome. Let's be bold. Let's be shameless. Let's be BRAZEN.

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